babble, mutant leg

In Which Fatso Is Compressed

I went to the chemist to pick up my prescription today – my third round of compression stocking(s) to try to fix my Mutant Leg.

The first pair that I got was off-the-shelf, Class-3. It’s so tight that I can’t have my fingers in the stocking while I put the thing on my foot. I have to slide it on, bit-by-bit, and then pull it up, bit-by-bit, and sort of wiggle my fingers in there.

It got to the point where I was cutting myself with my fingernails when I was trying to get them on, and I asked my doctor for a different one.

Round two was a made-to-measure, Class-1. Up-to-the-knee. I got it about a month ago, and I wore it once, because it felt like a normal sock, for one, and for two, it kept falling down. I felt like it was made for someone who was 5′ 0″, instead of someone 5′ 9″, almost 5′ 10″.

Round three, I picked up today: an over-the-knee stocking, made-to-measure, Class-2. The compression’s better: not too tight, but not falling-down slack, either… until you get to the bit that’s over the knee.

When we were measuring my thigh in the chemist last week, we were looking at the chart they give you, and they show the measurement as being quite high up the thigh. Like, almost around the top. So that’s where we measured.

I wish we’d measured a wee bit more, due south. Maybe around my knee again.

Yep, you guessed it.

Falling down.

It’s fine, below the knee. But everything above the thigh is a mess. It reaches halfway up my leg instead of to the top, like it showed in the original diagram, but if you look at the photos on the leaflet you get with the stockings…


It’s the length of regular “sexy” stockings. They also recommend the use of suspenders/garters or whatever they’re called, to keep the stockings up. I don’t know if you’ve ever tried wearing a garter belt with suspenders at a size 30/32, but it’s not very comfortable. It’s also very, very unsexy.

I’m thinking that I’m gonna go to the chemist tomorrow and ask to get remeasured. I’ll wear the stocking, show them what it’s like. It’s unwearable, unless I fold it down to my knee, which, according to the literature, I shouldn’t do. (“Any excess fabrick should be smoothed back into the stocking, DO NOT roll back the top of the stocking.”)

Either that, or it’s back to cutting myself while trying to put on the Class-3 stockings.

Which at least I have two of, so it looks just like a normal pair of socks.

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