FATGIRLslim

So, I went to the cinema today to see Tim Burton’s Alice In Wonderland, which was not as awesome as it could have been.

Last time I went to the cinema, I bought a drink. Didn’t have any sweets or anything. But then, last time I went to the cinema was with Mum and Dad to see Sherlock Holmes, and being under parental supervision is totally different from me and my sister going out alone together.

Cut to me eating a big bag of ASDA Onion Rings that I love, and a box of white chocolate Mikado (DAMN YOU, ALISON, IF YOU HADN’T MENTIONED IT… ) both of which were nummy, but good GOD, it was 7.5 Points for the Mikado and 11.5 Points for the Onion Rings, and.

Ouch.

So, to the gym I went!

Now, I’ve been trying to push myself on cardio – I’ve gone from 5 minutes on the treadmill at 3km/h to 10 or 15 minutes on the treadmill at anything between 4km/h and 5km/h – and tonight was my turn to push myself on the bike.

The past few times I’ve been to the gym, I’ve been on a recumbent bike. It gives my back more support, but it’s an odd way to work a bike, and tonight, the gym was busy enough that I had to wait for a treadmill, do my hand bike and THEN go on a treadmill, and when I got off the treadmill, I did more on the hand bike and then hopped on an elliptical for five minutes, and when I got off the elliptical, there were no bikes available oh god what do I dooooo.

I did my strength training while I was waiting – adduction, abduction, pec deck, squats and calf raises and the optimal rhomb thinger – and then went on one of the upright bikes.

And kinf of.

Didn’t get off for 25 minutes.

I actually started up a conversation with the Scottish-Indian guy who was on the power plate next to me (I forgot your name, I’m sorry! I’m terrible with names!) about how LOUD the power plate is, and the fact that I could feel the vibrations all up my bike.

(Seriously, I am not kidding about this.)

And then, he asked me how I was getting on. I said, and I quote: “I feel like I’m about to pass out, haha.”

Turns out, he was once my size. I didn’t believe him, of course, because he was about my sister’s height and built of what I assume is almost pure muscle! I’d actually seen him on the treadmill earlier, and he was running like he was born running, I’m not kidding.

And so, while I was pedalling away, we were talking about how he lost weight, and he said: “You can work as hard as you want in here, but if you go out there and eat wrong, this doesn’t count for anything.”

(Or something to that effect.)

And it was nice, to talk to him, to see the other side of the journey. And we both agreed:

Getting there is the hard part.

But he looked amazing, and he said he was now running 8 miles in an hour, when he could barely walk a mile before, when he was big.

And so that was nice. He went to work on the weights, and I let Queen ride me through the last five minutes. I was going to go for 30 minutes, but to be perfectly honest and a little TMI, the whole area between my legs was going numb, and the left leg of my shorts was riding right up and it was getting uncomfortable, so I let it go at 25 minutes.

Now, I checked. I joined the gym on February 15th, which means that I have been a member of the gym for less than a month. I’m in my fourth week, as a matter of fact. And that first day on the treadmill, on February 16th, I was a little out of breath going at 1.5mph for 5 minutes. I couldn’t manage the 5 minutes on the elliptical. The 5 minutes on the bike was like hell.

And now I’m able to do so much more. My hip’s still hurting like hell, the sciatica flaring up during the day and taking most of the day to settle down enough that I can exercise, and I still can’t lean forward for any length of time without leaning on something to support my weight, but I’m able to (with liberal application of Deep Freeze) manage 15 minutes on the treadmill, 25 minutes on the bike, and I’m going to eventually do more than 5 minutes on the elliptical.

Point is, I’ve come so far in 4 weeks that I can’t even believe it. I’m thrilled with this.

 

---

 

So, to tie into what I was saying above, today’s assignment is to give yourself credit. Give yourself credit for not eating bad foods, or give yourself credit for doing exercise even although you don’t feel like it.

Stuff like that.

Today, I gave myself credit for not totally sabotaging myself with the trip to the cinema. I’ve already negated the Mikado from the equation, and the swimming yesterday takes care of 1/3 of the pack of onion rings.

I was really tempted to not go to the gym today, because my hip was just that sore when I was walking from the cinema over to the far end of the ASDA car park, so much so that I was out of breath just from trying to keep myself upright.

But I went. As soon as I was home, I was thinking about it, thinking of what I could do to limit the damage, getting my socks and trainers on, changing into my longline shirt (the shorter ones ride up when I’m exercising, and it’s annoying) and just getting my bag together with my iPod and iPhone, my inhaler and my Deep Freeze.

I hummed and hawed for about fifteen minutes while I was talking to my friend Azy on AIM, and finally decided, fuck it, I’m going to the gym.

And I did.

(Funny side-story, actually: I said to Azy the other day that I have bruises on my left hand, in the meaty part between my thumb and first finger, and couldn’t remember hurting myself.

Tonight, while I was at the gym and on the treadmill, with my hands swinging loose at my sides, the same hand hit the side-handles on the treadmill, and I immediately thought, “Oh, that’s where I got that bruise from.”

One day soon, I will be a lot less wide, and therefore a lot less able to smack my hand off the handles.

Until then, I will just have to deal with the bruises.)

 

---

 

On a minor tangent: another reason to give myself credit. Yesterday, I bought Final Fantasy XIII for the PS3, and I haven’t even sat down to play it yet.

If it had come out a month and change ago, I’d probably be hours into it already. Instead, I spent time in the gym, and spent time with my little sister.

I’m sort of proud about that.